Rotzy was thinking of the gifts the Magi were giving. He got stuck on ‘myrrh.’
‘Tis the season, Right? Well, as if we all don’t have enough on our collective minds these days….such as what we want for Xmas, which in Rotzy’s case isn’t just my two front teeth, I’m looking/hoping for a new ‘entire upper partial plate’….way overdue, Santa….until I heard/saw the CTV-Kitchener News last Wednesday at 6:00 PM. This was/is one of those news items that does far more than just get your attention! Know what I’m sayin’? Well…..here it is, straight from the hip….and I quote the Anchor Lady….”There is a growing Guinea Pig population explosion! In Canada”!! Not in Europe or in Scandinavia. Not in Ireland, Wales or New South Wales….right here in ‘our home and native land’ for God’s sake! And it begs the question WHO ‘stands on guard for thee’? I immediately conjured up a vision of Ben….not Affleck, David Ben Gurion or even Ben Johnson (remember HIM?)….but BEN THE RAT! He was a ‘dirty rat’ (apologies to James Cagney) and so were the tens/hundreds of thousands of his sewer and dump-dwelling rat friends. Dirty. Well, plainly stated, Guinea Pigs are ‘becoming a problem….a large problem’ in numbers that are telling Canadians to ‘wake up’. And don’t be fooled, don’t even let the word ‘cute’ enter your pumpkin, G-pigs ARE rats! Well OK, almost. They’re not usually black, and they’re probably not filthy dirty, because they most often live in homes as pets or in laboratories, but rodents is what they are! Clearly, they don’t ‘have ‘tails’ like their ‘cousins’ but it says here that one of the G-pig over-population problems is a direct result of them ‘getting’ too much ‘tail’. Hence, for starters how about keeping the boy G-pigs and the girl G-pigs in separate living quarters?! Hello!? Well, it’s high tyme to shut this thing down! before it’s too late….like the ‘roos’ in Australia, or those wild Aussie frogs that ‘took over’ major parts of Queensland and New South Wales! And, if you were thinking about a new, little ball of brown and white fur/fluff surprising your little ones Xmas Morning….forget it! Get them a budgie. OR a ‘smallish’ python. In fact, if they already have a guinea pig or two….get them the snake anyway….to ‘keep the G/P’s company’.
Land Rage
Whilst crossing Terrace Hill St last Tuesday….on one of two crosswalks leading to BGH, Rotzy encountered a significant RAGE incident. Yours truly was on the way to visit Miz. Jo and the shortest/quickest route is the crosswalk without the signal lights leading to the Emerge Entrance….I’ve been using it for months with zero problems at all. The walk is well marked with yellow paint stripes for pedestrians to stay within and Rotzy always does. Stay within. One more thing, I’m betting 3 out of 4 drivers STOP for the ‘walking people’ to proceed….especially when they walk like yours truly does! I’m also betting that the fastly-approaching woman driver in the little, dark blue car was driver #4. Had to be. She was still coming and I stopped to wave her thru and said (to myself) “Hey Toad, looks like she wants to run your sorry ass into the pavement, right on top of those yellow lines”! She DID stop (without screeching the tires) and looked to be about 40/45. Then gave me ‘the look’ and ‘the horn’ at the same tyme. Look, schmook, but the horn ‘blast’ (it wasn’t a ‘peep’ or a ‘toot) scared me, almost ‘soiling myself’. Well sir/m’am, she got a really loud ‘cough’ outta Rotzy….a ‘far cough’, even tho we were only about a car length apart. HER car. I’m not even sure what more I might have said to her…..about her horn. Bottom line, don’t scare/piss off the oldsters with your horn. So….SO….when I made it to the other side of the street here is this skinny 20-something kid holding onto his I/V ‘tree with wheels’ (and enough tubes going into him for three people) and he says to me ”Way to go!…………sir”. Then he bummed a smoke from me.
W E H T Continues On….
This one’s my own, just popped into Rotzy’s pumpkin when I was doing Sunday’s “F/N” portion, and it’s an actual natural….nothing added….or taken out. ‘What Ever Happened To Baby Jane’? A (circa 1960) movie about two sisters….’Baby Jane’ Hudson (played by Bette Davis) a former huge name child star who now was the caregiver for her invalid sister Blanche (played by Joan Crawford) who had been a big name Hollywood actress in romance films. Well…..Bette Davis scared the crap out of a teenage Rotzy! She still does!! It was at the Capitol Theatre….and likely cost .50 cents to get in…..meaning about $50.00 in today’s currency! As well as the movie they also had a ‘Baby Jane Look-a-like Contest’ and my buddy’s sister WON it! Yup, Mary-Jane had become Baby Jane….and she looked SO much like Bette Davis that she also scared the crap out of Rotzy!! But even scarier was another Joan Crawford film, ‘Straitjacket’ with Joan doing the scare honours. And did she ever. Scare me. In fact I was SO ****ing terrified I stayed to watch it a second tyme. Hey….at .50 cents to get in, your want to get your money’s worth!
*Thought Of The Day…I just thought of a gift I’d like to add to my ‘Wish List’…. Myrrh. That’s right….Myrrh. Rotzy’s fully aware of what Gold is, and methinks Frankincense is like those fragrant oils ….but ‘Myrrh’? No idea! None. But if it was ‘good enough for Jesus’, well you know…..
